Episode 41: The Journey of a Female Entrepreneur with Mariam Demian
Hi, Welcome to How did you learn to do that? Podcast where you will hear tips, guidance, and stories to help you to have a fulfilling life and career. The inspirational stories that you will hear from people will inspire you to know that you can create anything you want in your life. And it just takes commitment and action.
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Podcast show notes for this episode
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How to get to know yourself with Career and Personal Development Coaching
So as many of you know, I am also a career coach, a personal development coach, a mindfulness coach. I do coach new graduates, early career professionals, but I also coach people that are far in their career, 10 years, 15 years, 20 years that are just not feeling happy. They’re not feeling fulfilled. They’re not feeling like they’re living their true purpose to really keep asking themselves.
What else is there? Is there more to life? Is there more that I could be doing? I’ve got the career. I completed school, I got the career. I have the family. I have, you know, everything that I thought I wanted and I have it open. Now they’re at that place. That’s asking themselves that question where they want to ask themselves that question of how do I connect deeper with myself?
What can I do to connect with myself, to figure out who I am and what I’m supposed to be doing in this world? So what I’m going to do is I’m going to actually break it down into a couple of different sections. So over the next three months, I’m going to be talking to you about your mindset, about personal development, about things that you can do to connect with yourself deeper, to really get to know who you are and what you’re here to do and how you can build a fulfilling life and career for yourself.
And then I’m going to move through more tangible things of what you can do for your career, how you can know your why, how you can align with your why and how you can actually have the confidence to network to achieve and get close to your why and your purpose and how you can maintain that throughout life and everything that you’re doing.
How to get to know yourself with 1:1 Coaching Sessions!
Book your FREE 30 minute call to find out if it is for you NOW!
I will be also offering some one-on-one coaching for, for folks that don’t necessarily want to take a course, but want a little bit of guidance around mindset and really figuring out how to feel fulfilled and what the next steps are. And someone that wants to develop a bit of a morning practice or an evening practice and routine that keeps them accountable and that they’re able to connect with themselves.
I will be offering some one-on-one sessions with you where we can hop on a call weekly and just to keep you accountable for about the span of four weeks. And then hopefully you can then flourish and go out on your own and spread your wings and create this life for yourself.
If you want to learn more, book a FREE 30 minutes call with me NOW!
The Successful Candidate Course
I launched The Successful Candidate course in November. I am going to be launching it again in April. And so I’m excited for you to be a part of that. And I am going to create a Facebook group for everyone that registers into the course so that you can have support and guidance as you’re going through this process for yourself.
And I will be there every other week. We’ll be doing a mastermind and we’ll be sharing thoughts and ideas and challenges and things that you’re going through and things that you could do more of or things you could do less of, or how I can help you troubleshoot a little bit and give you some. Tips and some prompts and some ideas of things that you could try out to see if they’re going to work for you.
So I just want to say, although my course is marketed and geared towards new graduates or early career professionals, it’s really for anybody that wants to be in a place where they’re having a fulfilling career and a fulfilling life. There’s so much to be learnt in that course. So if you want to sign on, I’d be happy to jump on a call with you to chat about it.
You can read more about my story and why I developed this course here!
Otherwise I will see you in the course and hopefully we’ll see you at the masterminds as well.
In the meaning, you can book your FREE 30 minute call to learn how to connect deeper with yourself and bring fulfillment to your life and career!
The Journey of a Female Entrepreneur with Mariam Demian
I’m so excited to welcome Mariam Demian to the, How did you learn to do that? Podcast today! Thank you so much for joining me to share your journey as a female entrepreneur.
Mariam Demian is the founder and owner of Caffeinated Media Solutions a digital marketing agency working with small businesses on giving their online presence a ‘jolt’ of sustainable energy!
After a decade spent working in marketing and heading up large budget national campaigns Mariam would find herself unfulfilled and sometimes even unemployed after budget cuts and ‘re-structuring.’ So she founded Caffeinated Media Solutions with the intention of bringing the same level service only available for the large budget organizations to start-ups, offering plans customized to work for them where they’re at in their marketing & e-commerce journeys.
Cairo born, Ottawa raised, Mariam’s own journey into marketing wasn’t quite linear, as she had first thought she would work in the field of Criminal Justice. But after a year spent in South Korea teaching and backpacking solo, she ended up in marketing as she found it rewarding and fascinating to be able to communicate a message through various means and mediums beyond linguistic barriers.
In the years since moving to Vancouver from Ottawa, Mariam achieved two unorthodox dreams of completing a documentary filmed in Cambodia on a handy cam and seeing it screened at the Female Eye Film Festival in Toronto, as well as self-publishing a fictional novel called “Nawal, from Cairo to Canada” currently available in the Indie section at the Vancouver Public Library.
The journey of a female entrepreneur
Angeza: Wow. That’s so interesting. So much that I didn’t know about you. That’s so cool. I want to see the link to your video. Definitely share it cause I’d want to check it out and I know people would want to check it out. Andrew books. So cool. Um, well we could talk about Cambodia and traveling suits. Honestly, one of my most favorite places in the world, which I feel like it’s such a hidden gem, no one really talks about, but, um, is one of my favorite places.
So I’m so excited to have you on the podcast.
Mariam: Thank you so much for having me. Yeah, I know. I was kind of laughing at the end of my bio. It sounds just so all over the place, you know, but such as life and that’s, that’s how. That’s how it’s, that’s how the cookie crumbled.
Angeza: Well, the best, the best life journeys are not a straight line.
Right? It’s a bit of, a bit of a, you know, like a zigzag or a swirl, I think. And for me too, I actually saw something. Recently. Um, so when that, Oh, Ida, um, I don’t know if you follow Ida too, so I don’t wonder why that has also been on the podcast. She posted a question today on her Instagram around, are you pursuing the career that you went to school for or are you doing what you had.
Thought you would do when you graduated high school or college. And I had to think about it. And I remember the first thing I did when I was about to graduate high school was I applied for, um, school at the university of British Columbia in the Oakenoggen though, which. From my house was a five to six hour drive, which would mean I’d have to move out, which would mean that my parents were not okay with it.
You know? And then the second one was like, okay, if you’re not going to let me go move out of the house that I’m going into broadcast journalism, which was a field of my parents. You know, it was like a rebel thing. Cause my parents did not see it as valuable. It’s not
Mariam: doctor pharmacist engineer. Right?
Exactly. Same.
Angeza: Yeah. I was like, okay for med school, but you have to let me move out now or I’m going to be a broadcast journalist and to have both of them were no. So, um, so I remember when I applied for the broadcast journalism though, I did go to their info night and he was the first time I really felt.
That’s something resonated with me. Like, I felt like, Oh, this makes sense. This is exactly where I want to be. Um, you know, and then I went, I ended up actually going into healthcare and public health and, um, and I do love it, but now I’m coming back full circle with this podcast media and like developing this kind of media forum, um, and coming back to a form of journalism or broadcasting or, um, You know, having this podcast.
So when I was, so when I, as I was reading, you know, you have the, the movie and the film and the book, I’m like, Oh my gosh, like you are pursuing all your passions.
Mariam: I mean, it didn’t start off like that. You know, when I was. You know, you tell a 17, 18 year old to decide their entire life, right? Like by going to now, you choose what you love and does anyone love the same thing?
Like, I don’t know how many years later I won’t go into that, but you know what I mean? It’s like, So when I was going to university, I get my, for myself as well. It was like, you’re not leaving the house. You’re not like, what is this? You know, you don’t leave, you know, it, you know, you’ll leave when you get married.
That’s how it
Angeza: [goes. You,
Mariam: you get a university degree, that’s honorable enough to marry, essentially. Right. And then, uh, and then. And then you’re off go wherever you want, but it’s not going to be on your own. My parents were never like their traditional, I think, because I think they also had to be, you know, um, but essentially I wasn’t allowed to leave.
My mom was like, if the program is in Ottawa, you’re staying in Ottawa. And I was like, all right, all my friends were staying too. Cause all my, you know, I had a lot of Egyptians, so I got stick it out together. Um, so I did, I went into criminology. With the intent of going into, uh, law and becoming a criminal defense lawyer.
That was my grand plan at 1819, because, uh, simply absolutely because all my friends always said that I argue so much about anything and everything that I should be a lawyer. Like that’s just a natural trajectory. Oh, you argue a lot. You should just be a lawyer.
Angeza: I feel like when I heard that so much about anyone that argues a lot, it’s like go be a lawyer.
Mariam: And it’s just, um, and being impressionable and not really knowing like, I wasn’t into, you know, I, I knew I wasn’t going to be in medical or engineering or anything like that. Those aren’t my interests at all. So I went into criminology, just, you know, sight-unseen going, yeah, sure. This is going to work out.
That is just gonna work out. Um, but you know, through the years,
Angeza: things
Mariam:moved in a different way and after university, um, and trying to outset a couple of times and anyone who’s ever tried, the L sat to get into law school will attest to the fact that it is written by the devil himself. It is not, it’s just not, I don’t know.
My brain just wouldn’t. I. Couldn’t get the right results. I always got close, but not enough to get into law school. So anyway, so after university, I decided, um, somehow, and this is the comical part, I guess I never really thought about it this way, but only three or four years earlier, I was then allowed to leave the house because you know, the program was in Ottawa and I had to go to university and be traditional and follow the right path.
Um, but then once university ended. I was like, I think I’m going to go to South Korea and teach English. I don’t know. They didn’t put up that. I don’t remember them putting up that much of a fight. I think they like internally knew that I just, I’m just not the type of person that’s gonna follow the exact same path, um, that I was supposed to, or I don’t know.
Yeah. You know what I mean? So I went to South Korea. I didn’t know the language. I didn’t know anyone there. Um, I didn’t know that kimchi was their national food. Um, you know, and like nothing. So I went through a recruiter, got a job and moved to South Korea, um, to teach English and where my coworkers were supposed to have been English speakers.
They were not at all. Um, That was interesting because it was, um, it was 2005. And so that meant that Google wasn’t so great at translating just yet. There weren’t these apps, there was no social media. Yes, it was that long ago. It’s crazy to think, but it was, um, it was really, really trying, but it became a little bit of a fun situation where I’m communicating with my coworkers.
Was just to me, it was hilarious because they had this, their own translating machine or something I don’t program. And they would print out the translations and like hand them to me of what they’re trying to say. And it made no sense whatsoever. It was just, it was the most. It was just so funny that sometimes I would be like, okay, yeah.
And just go home and then get a knock at my door. Like an hour later. Like, no, you come with, know, but it was, it was a defining year. I met a lot of ex-pats there from all around the world, which was really fun. Obviously met and made some friends in Korea who are Korean learned a little bit of Korean. Um, that gets me, it’s like menu. Korean not, I can’t speak much, but, um, but yeah, it was a defining year.
I went home to Ottawa with a totally different mindset, um, and just trying to get work and figuring out what I want to do. But the recruiter who had sent me who had gotten me a job in South Korea, um, ended up offering me a job, which actually was out here in Vancouver because they were located in gas town.
And I never thought I would ever move, uh, out here to the rainy coast, but I was just at a point where I was like, I don’t think there’s a future for me in Ottawa. So I packed up my bags of my life and came out here in 2008. Um, And since then it’s been crazy. But while I was in South Korea, I hadn’t, I had started a blog on blogger.com.
Um, I sound ancient right now. I’m not it and exists. I don’t know if the blocks do exist, but I use blogger to create, um, a form of communication with my family and friends. And I would just write my stories and. All of what’s happening about the translations and the pictures and the food and the people. And, um, and the, you know, just everything that happens there.
And then everyone liked it. People were like, Oh, I just sent it to a friend. Just send this to, you know, I had this little following, um, and I realized then that I’m like, Oh, okay. I guess I can write, but I had proof it wasn’t just, Oh, you can argue. I wrote in a way that was engaging. So I was like, okay, this is fantastic. So when I had gone back to Ottawa, I had started writing a book. I had this idea and I started it. Um, but it took me, you know, it was like, it was a pet project for a while. It was like my baby. So I had that going for years and years. And then, um, anyway, when I came to, uh, Vancouver, the job with, um, with the recruiter was to, it was essentially the social media.
At that point, there was Facebook, um, and it was to communicate with the, with the clients and the HRS and whatever. So that’s where it kind of began, like the way I see Korea. It was a place where I learned that communication is. The absolute key. And I was able to figure out how, because while I was there, I also backpacked in other countries where I didn’t speak their language.
Right. But you learn how to communicate because humans have this same type of, um, like gestures for like watches. Not that we have watches anymore, but you know, there’s certain things where we can align without verbal communication. And so. It kind of shifted while I was there from just arguing to making a point via media.
Um, and I began working at the recruiters here and after that, I decided to go to BCI for broadcast communication. Um, and that’s where I learned that I really, really want to make this. A documentary. That was just my dream. Um, and my very, very, very good friend was like, yeah, sure. I’ll do it with you. I was like, Oh, okay.
I guess we’re doing this. You know, she made a dream come true for me. Um, it wasn’t originally supposed to be very quickly. I was supposed to be in Egypt. We had our flights, we had everything going and everything set up. But then the night before. I think it was the night before he was supposed to leave the revolution broke out.
So kind of put a kink in the plans because there was no travel that was going to be possible for awhile. We held out, we cry, Oh my gosh. It was like, we’d put so much into the plan that that was the biggest stretch I’ve ever, ever experienced. But we quickly changed it around, went to Cambodia for the same time I’ll pick, which is, um, the legalities of, uh, adoption in certain countries.
So in Egypt it’s not, uh, permitted adoption is not permitted. And in Cambodia at the time, there was a moratorium on adoption. So, uh, um, we. You went to Cambodia and we quickly like reject everything. Took our Sony Handycam. That’s like a hundred dollars anyway. Um, I still, I don’t know how we pulled it off, but thanks to her.
Who’s she was the videographer and editor and we got it done, came home to Vancouver and turned it into the. Uh, female, I felt festival. Um, and through all this I’m working, obviously in all types of marketing jobs and social media finishing my degree diploma at BCT. Um, there was always something else going on, obviously like moving me along, but that’s the very rare.
Found about way of getting into marketing in the first place. It’s really about the communication, um, of messages. So whether it’s, you know, through a visual, medium and audible, a medium or, um, or a written one, you know, and. Um, my book was still on my heart, you know, like it was still something that I needed to continue.
My mom would always be like, don’t let her die. Like give her life. And that was, she was like my biggest motivator. She’s like, you can’t let this go. I want to read it. And so I continued to write and it took me like, um, 10 years. To put, to publish it, to finish it and publish it. Um, self published. I learned all about self publishing through cause everything, by the way that I’ve done, including my current business bootstrap, didn’t start with knowledge.
Didn’t start, it started with like a passion, right. And I’ll fast forward a bit. So I published the book in 2018. Um, And through, I’ve been like marketing manager here, marketing manager, there, huge campaigns, et cetera. But there were these layoffs, right? Like layoffs happen. Um, it’s not the right fit, restructuring finances,
I was just tired of it. Um, after my, my first layoff in, I think 2014, I had started registered. Kathleen did media solutions and actually came up with the name over coffee with a friend at like pallet 49 or, uh, yeah, the coffee and donut place. Right. And, um, and. I still have the napkin was she drew like the first logo concept and everything.
So it was that special to me. And I started it with the intention of working with small businesses. Um, but then I got scared. Went back to work, got full-time jobs, lay off again, they off again. I was like, okay, that’s it. I’m done. I, I want to take control. I want to bet on myself. That’s why I always say that.
I wanted to bet on myself, my knowledge. Um, to start this business and work with small businesses to give them, like I said, in the bio, um, to give them the same kind of knowledge and a chance in marketing and advertising that I knew could be done for larger companies. Um, I know it can be done on a budget.
I know it can be done, uh, logically coherently clearly because a lot of times we’ll throw the jargon out and the acronyms and people are like, Yeah, but they don’t understand, but they fear understanding. They fear asking. Right. So on my, uh, I continue to just try to work with small businesses to help them understand what they need, even if they’re not working with me.
But then when they are working with me to be very, very clear and have it like be a, uh, a collaborative situation. It’s not, I’m no better than you, just because I have this model. I’m kidding. I don’t know the knowledge that you have in running a restaurant. Like you don’t want me to run a restaurant. Uh, so yeah, that’s the very roundabout way of how caffeinated media solutions has come to be and how I’ve become an entrepreneur.
Angeza: Yeah. I love that story and I feel like it’s very, uh, like some of the stuff you’re saying, I was like, Oh my gosh, I remember that. I remember. Um, similar to you having registered my faulting business in 2016, but not really taking a contract until 2018 several years later and not really pursuing it that much, but I registered it.
I remember at the time it was because I had finished my master’s and I was just looking at all these jobs and there was just not a lot of jobs in my field. And I also was, um, and I’ve always. Um, been drawn to entrepreneurship and always been drawn to the flexibility of just running your days away. You want to run it, like if you want to work late at night and you want to take the morning off that’s okay.
Like you don’t have to be there set on someone’s schedule. Um, and that’s what I really appreciate about the entrepreneurship life. It’s it’s I mean, you get some time freedom, but in the long run, you’ll get it. And the upfront you put a lot more time. And so you’ve kind of banked that time for the future.
Um, But that’s what I really wanted to do. And so I was like, okay, I’m going to consult in a, set up this business. And, but then there’s a lot to get it going. Right. And I, like you said, like I ended up getting a job and I fell back to that security, that stability. And I was like, okay. And then I did that for a period of time until my maternity leave.
But now I’m in that place from, I wanna start doing that, uh, consulting and, um, And have replaced my day job and having this podcast and this business and going through this journey. And it’s really been, um, powerful that we can, we can actually create these things for ourselves that really pursue, um, and similar to what you just shared.
My husband, he works in the oil and gas industry. He’s a, he works in the, on the engineering and design side. Um, And, uh, and yeah, and he just like, you know, the oil and gas industry, it’s like a boom and bust cycle all the time. Right. You know, it rotates kind of like every decade or so it’s hot and it’s slow.
Um, and we got married in 2015 and I always laugh and make, we’ll make a little fun of him. And I say that, you know, every single year we’ve been married, You’ve been laid off.
It’s like constant. And then obviously when COVID hit, because it was his own business, he would consult his services. So we COVID hit, of course, you know, everything kind of, and even now, I don’t know if the gas prices have recovered as much, but, um, obviously nobody was driving anywhere. So gas demand has lowered and no planes so lower again.
Um, and so he was let go, and then he, he, you know, Worked for six months. And he was home for six months, actually with our daughter while I was working. And he really enjoyed that. But he obviously, when you’re laid off, your initial thought is I need a job. Like I need to get a job. He ended up getting a job.
Um, And didn’t love it. And recently, actually just yesterday we were, or two nights ago we were having the discussion around, um, how would this work? They, the expectation was that there would be kind of like a 12 hour Workday, 60, 80 hour work weeks. Like we evenings weekends, like there was just no limit to it.
And, um, and yeah, and then we just, um, a few days ago I said, you know what I said, why don’t you just. You don’t take the plunge, like just, just quit and start your business. Cause you’d know you’ve always wanted to, and he’s always had that, that idea, these ideas of the business. So what you’re saying about just having enough of the layoffs and enough of the hard work and.
This place or that place, and just having something for yourself and if you’re going, and I’m a huge believer that if you’re going to put effort into something, it should be for yourself. Um, there’s just, there’s a lot more to life than working. And I feel like from the time we’re kids until, you know, the end of our career, it’s just like, Everything around us in life, always has to do with your career.
Always has to do with like your job and your, you even introduce yourself and identify yourself by your title of your job versus saying like, hi, I’m going to dress. And. You know, try to ex
Angeza: Yeah. Hey, I’m, you know, I’m the host of this podcast or I have my own business and it’s just like, who are you?
And I remember one, and to be honest, if someone asked me that they’re like, don’t tell me about your achievements and your work and your resume because it’s in front of me for who are you? And I couldn’t,
Mariam: I’ve been there. Yeah,
Angeza: exactly. I know what you mean, right. Yeah, no, it was like, I really appreciate you sharing that.
Um, and is it just in that I was talking about VCT bodkins journalists haven’t you went to vodcast a little there too. Um, yeah. That’s so exciting. Yeah. I love everything that you shared. So yeah. So how, I’m just curious, how did the documentary come, come to be? Like, I know you said you guys had to switch plans and go to Cambodia, but did you have to travel to multiple different areas or did you keep to like the main cities and like, how did you actually find the stories that you were looking for or start exploring what you wanted to I’m
Mariam: trying to think back.
So what happened was, like I said, Uh, you know, we couldn’t go to Cairo. Right. Um, so we needed a place right away that I don’t think we even thought of where else could we go? Or we were thinking about it. And then my friend’s mom, uh, was at her church and there was someone there from an orphanage in Cambodia. And that is actually how Cambodia even entered the picture. I’d never been. That well, I’ve been to Thailand, Vietnam, like I’d never ventured right to Cambodia. Um, so it was like, okay. Um, so she had this pamphlet that these nice people gave at their church. And I, we looked at it, we thought about it and, um, we were able to secure an interview with that orphanage.
Um, once we landed in Cambodia and then I somehow, secured. An interview with, um, a director at UNICEF Cambodia as well as then a third, like we just researched and emailed who wants to talk to us. Um, and it wasn’t different places throughout Cambodia, but it’s not a very large country.
Um, it was an insane experience traveling through. On paved roads and on all kinds of trucks and seeing, um, you know, the, uh, the Vespas with, um, with like a whole family, it was like, Oh my God. And how are they doing this? Meanwhile, I’m like petrified for my life anywhere I go. Right. Um, so it was really, yeah, so they were in different places through Cambodia, but like, not yet, as I said, they’re not very.
They were all, um, via a bus or, um, uh, took, took or whatever. Um, we did have an incident where one guy we hired from the hotel or hostel or whatever, cause we were bootstrapping this. So it was like, we were staying at places that, I mean, I don’t know that they were so cheap. It was very questionable, but, but, um, but yeah, so he, we had hired him.
So like take us to this orphanage. And it was so far away, it was like an hour out of Phnom Penh or, um, yeah, something like that. And then we finished our interview and at the time he was supposed to be there, like he just was not there and we start, I started panicking. She was trying to like, Calm it down.
And then we would take turns panicking, like how are we ever going to get back to the city? Um, so we, you know, we had a few of those incidents, but it was, it was phenomenal learning from all the people that we spoke to, um, why there was a moratorium at the time. And the reason that it was even a topic of choice is just because, um, I don’t know why, how I can’t explain this, but for me, orphans has always been something that’s like, unacceptable. Like, why are there even orphans? Why is there? And then if there are orphans because it’s life, I know like, uh, sometimes it just is the way it is. Right. Um, but then why would adoption not be allowed? That’s such an unfair situation to me to give a child a suitable life, or I shouldn’t say suitable because.
It all depends on their current situation, et cetera. There’s a million ways I can talk about that. But at the end of the day, it was just this topic that I really, really wanted to bring to light. And in Cairo, it’s not permitted because of religious reasons. Um, and the research we’d done on that, just, it broke my heart, but in Cambodia, the moratorium at the time was because of trafficking.
So it was to control trafficking. And the saddest part was that a lot of the orphans. Um, and I’ll give the link. It’s not as happy, super happy documentary, by the way, whoever watches it. Okay. And it was done on a Handycam. So those are the preface of that. But, uh, but in Cambodia and places like it, um, a lot of times people just can’t afford to have their kids, so they give them up to the, um, to the, uh, the temples to live with the monks or whatever, or the orphanages.
Um, so sometimes they do have family and that’s the saddest part. Um, but is there a solution? I don’t know what the situation is right there. Um, right now they were trying to stop trafficking. So that’s why we were in Cambodia doing documentary about what about adoption? Um, that’s how that came to be.
Angeza: Yeah. Wow. I, um, I love documentary, especially powerful ones like that. That really, you know, Not only teach you something new, but they just pull your heart strings. And just that feeling of like, how could this be? Um, I absolutely love those kinds of documentaries, so I’d, I’d love to watch yours. Yeah. So what I was saying was that my husband, I took a trip to Southeast Asia and I grabbed the lonely planet book and it had like this eight week tour of the area and we did it actually over two months.
So a little bit longer than eight. No, it was a three week tour, but we did it over eight weeks. Um, And then one of the places was cm reap Cambodia, and the other one was, um, non pen, like you said. And a couple of like some, uh, something in the middle. I can’t remember the name of it. One of the towns. And, um, at the time I was like, do we really want to go to Cambodia?
My husband was like, you know, all, and we had fun, like, like you said, Thailand, Vietnam. Uh, we had kind of like Malaysia, Singapore, Bali. Um, and my husband goes, these are all beach areas where we could lay out the beach, this one’s landlocked. Like, what are we doing there? And I was like, Oh, I dunno. It just tells us we should go.
And let’s just check it out. It ended up actually being our most favorite place of the entire trip, because see, I’m raped. It’s like historically always been a backpacker’s low journey. And with Amber watt right there, it’s just. It was so much fun and we just loved it. But in the same token, the people, you know, having been gone, having gone through everything that they’ve gone through and the resiliency that, that they have and like the generosity that they have and just how kind they are as people.
Yeah, I’m just grateful, just grateful for the life that they have with as much, or as little as they have, but just that, that passion and that beautifulness, it really took me back. And then obviously going to non Penn was a different story. Cause in Sam pre reap was like a party town right now. I’m Penn, like you’ve mentioned, it was a different story because we to learn more about the Camaro Rouge and we went to the sites that they, um, The tourist sites.
So they talk about it, but we also visited with, um, a couple of temples and just heard from locals, some stories. Um, but yeah, it was, it was, it ended up being one of my most favorite places. And when you say, you know, the driving through dirt roads and seeing seven people at one motorcycle, you’re just like, how is this?
Like, you know, but, um, I remember actually as kind of a little off topic, but I remember coming in from bank conflict, we had to take a bus from Bangkok to tamari. And I remember trying to see if we can get a flight and it was like, there weren’t really flights, but we could take this bus. So I was like, okay, let’s just do the bus now, coming from hearing, being naive and hearing about security issues.
I was like, so scared of taking the bus because I was like, Are we going to get like stopped halfway through and like, are we going to be kidnapped or hurt or anything? I just, it was just me being naive and ignorant. And I mean, it was there’s challenges, of course there’s security issues, but for the most part, the people are so nice that I felt really safe there.
Um, but we did end up actually going to the border, uh, between Thailand and then Cambodia. And it was like, we stopped in the middle of this. Village with literally like straw little houses. And I thought it was like a campaign ground or something, but it was, it was huts like homes of people. It was just a village and we get out.
And everyone’s like get out and they there and I was a kid. Can we get our bags? Like, Oh no, we’re going to cross the border and we’ll have the bags on the other side. Yeah.
Mariam: I think I, this is bringing back memories. I think I probably did the same thing. Yeah.
Angeza: And then there was just the locals of that village are just standing there telling you, go this way, go that way.
And it was like amazed and to get to this really like. Shady looking building and you get to the building and they I’m like, what is this? And then one of the locals is like the border. It’s like, what? And like you walked into this building go upstairs and it’s just like one table, one guy sitting there and you go up to, if he stamps your passport and then you’re in, you’re in Cambodia. And I was just like, Yeah. Yeah. I think I remember that you have to walk across unless I’m now making memories out because I think so.
Mariam: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It’s it really is a special place. And my friend has gone back since,
I don’t remember what year she went back, but after we went in 2011, um, and she said, you know, the saddest part is, you know, it is being.
Right. So there’s just buildings ever. When we were there, it was cranes everywhere. She’s like those cranes have moved and now it’s just these high rises and it doesn’t look the same at all. Um, so I’m kind of glad that we saw it when we did, because it, because it was raw and the people are so they are very kind and yeah.
Learning about the Khmer Rouge was just, I mean, it’s like, how did this happen in our lifetime? You know, how did this happen? Um, unnoticed and it really wakes you up to other world events that we’re not paying attention to, which is a whole different podcast. But, uh, but yeah, it was it’s it’s it was one of the five, I mean, I’ve had, I guess a few defining moments, but being there and doing that documentary was definitely, uh, it was, it was fantastic.
And I’m so I’m grateful to my friend, Andrea, because she she’s the one that was like, Yeah, we’re doing it like done, you know, if I say we’re doing something, there’s a, there could be a question Mark, like, you know, but she helped me. Make this dream come true for me and then her. So,
Angeza: Well, that’s amazing. And I’m so excited that you shared that in your bio. Otherwise I would have never known and I’ll share the link in the show notes. So anyone that’s listening, you can check out, check out the documentary. Um, so yeah, so let’s, let’s get back on to you and kind of this journey that you’ve been on, um, And really making that commitment.
Once you have that layoff and you are the series of labs and you were like, I’m done, I’m starting something for myself. So what was, what was that first thing that you did? I know you, you registered the business, but when you actually wanted to get it going, what was the first thing that you did and how, like, how did you feel?
How did you get through the barriers you would put up for yourself? And just say that like, I believe in myself, I believe in this and here’s what we’re going to do.
Mariam: You know what? I am not going to lie and say, I came up with some master plan. It was a point like I was driving home from getting laid off from, in Surrey.
So it was a nice long drive back to Vancouver. And, um, and I was just like, what just happened? And how can I make it? So that, that doesn’t happen to me again. So that was really that moment where I just thought I, and I felt defeated too. I don’t want anyone listening, thinking like, Oh, and then it was boom.
Like I had this big light bulb. It was just, it was actually a moment of defeat that I never want it to be again, if I, you know, it was so deflating, it’s so very deflating to be like, But I tried to help you. You know, I tried my best here and whatever happened happened with that last one. So when I let myself to be, I’m going to be totally transparent.
I think I went, I probably, I can’t fully remember, but I might’ve stopped at the liquor store first, take her some wine, um, for the, to deal, you know, not to deal like it’s not. But to hope, I guess. Um, and then I went, my business is still registered. I can do this. I know I can, because I’ve been doing it for clients, with the agencies and in-house, um, let’s do this.
What can I do? So I went back to my GoDaddy account and my website account. Cleaned it up thought about what I can do there, what services I can do. Um, I was lucky enough to have EDI to get me through. So that is such a benefit. Yeah, we have there, I mean, in the meantime, when we’re paying taxes, it never feels great, but when you need it and you didn’t ever know you’d needed that badly, I’m happy to pay taxes, frankly.
So, so, um, So, yeah, I basically used, I decided to use the time I had for AI to start digging, like hit the ground running. Um, and I knew when it would end, so I. Started, um, putting out feelers, um, applying for certain things. If I saw something on Facebook groups on, um, you know, on message boards and whatnot, that could use my help rather than hire an agency for example, and stuff like that.
So I started putting out feelers, um, and, and went from there to be honest, I’m happy that I also, um, I participated in this little, I don’t want to say conference, but I talk, I guess, with, um, other female entrepreneurs. And, um, one of them had said to me, and she was a mortgage separate specialist, so nothing to do.
Do with what I was doing, but I had such a hard time investing, like when you’re on EDI and you’ve got rent and you’ve got bills, you don’t really think like, Oh, I have money to invest in my business right now. But there was the moment where I was like, I hate my website and I want a new one. It’s going to cost this much.
She’s like, you’re going to make that back. Triple. If not more, you’re not even going to think about that amount anymore. Just do it. Like I promise it will pay off. And, um, and I did, I went home and paid for another site and cleaned it up and, and it has went through, you know, I’ve had a few iterations of my website, but for me, my, you know, you put your best foot forward and you make an impression.
And what impression did I want to put out there? So I looked at my website first, um, my services and then, yeah, and then hit the ground running just. Putting feelers out there started with one client, um, on a different type of deal. And then I created, um, I hosted meetups to meet new people that might be interested in these services who also owned small businesses.
Um, and I honestly went from there. It’s a day-to-day thing. And I was just speaking to a client this morning, um, on like a marketing. Coaching call. And I was telling her, I’ve realized that owning a business is like having a relationship. You have to choose it every day. And sometimes it’s by the hour.
Sometimes, sometimes it’s like, I love you, but I don’t like you right now. I have to just take some space, go for a while. Well for, I like do anything, but look at it, um, until you turned back. So yeah, it’s not entrepreneurship. I think we were speaking about it earlier. Like it’s not for everyone. It’s when you want stability, when your life is about looking for stability, it’s not going to be entrepreneurship.
Mariam: There’s no sureties. There’s, you know, it’s how much can you put in? And you’re not always going to get the same. You’re not always going to have a positive ROI. You know, your return on investment is not always going to be positive. You’re going to have upset clients. You’re going to have to renegotiate contracts.
There’s so much, but it’s all in the process. And. I’m happy I chose it because it just, it gives me, uh, an amount of autonomy that I think I was seeking through all those jobs that you just, you can’t have when you have a job.
Angeza: Yeah. Yeah. I love that. And I, I totally agree with you there because I feel that, um, Although you don’t get the stability in terms of income or, um, you know, just, just seeing in the work.
Cause sometimes the work can be a lot and sometimes it could be almost, non-existent what I do appreciate about it though. Um, and for me it really has to do with my daughter. It’s really was the catalyst. Um, and now she was the catalyst, like all me going, but now there’s just a whole series of other things that make me appreciate entrepreneurship and that’s just having a better.
And I don’t know, some people might say this is not true, but having, or the ability to work towards a better work-life balance in a sense where. Um, you know, if you want to sleep in that’s okay. Cause you’re tired. You want to stay up late and work that’s okay. Because it’s working for yourself and, um, or if you want to take a break mid day to go for a walk or do an exercise class, or go for lunch with a friend that you haven’t seen in a while.
That’s okay. And you don’t have to rush back after an hour to the office, you know? And my biggest thing that I hated. Being in the office was, and I always feel, and I totally, if I said, if I grow this into a business where I’m employing people, I hope, I mean, when I’m going to employ this and try it out, but I feel like we should work based on productivity.
You know, and if there’s a series of tasks that I need to get done, or the series of things that I need to do this week, that if I complete that in two days, there’s zero reason for me to then just sit there, staring at a screen for three days, pretending to be busy. Pretending to be busy. Exactly. Like I used to have a colleague who would read it, like she would find PDFs of books or audio books online for free.
And she would read a book for eight hours a day because she just didn’t have enough work to do because her work was dependent on someone else. And that person wasn’t there that week. And so really she had nothing to do. And I just kept thinking to myself, I’m like, if this was my company and paying somebody to read.
All my time, you know, which I would pay for someone to read. Cause I think tweeting is so canceled point, but if it has to do with the business or has to do with advancing their knowledge or them personally, and that’s going to be something I want to incorporate in my business, but. For the work that we were doing at the time, it didn’t make sense, but I used to think the same thing.
I’m like, if I can get all my work done in two days for three days, I should be off and I should still get paid a full-time salary because I’m working on productivity. Other people, they like to work a bit slower and they, they do take the full five days, which is totally fine because we’re all different and varied.
But if we work based on our productivity, Um, basis versus an hour basis, like getting 40 hours in a week. Um, I think we would be a little better off because we could, we could do a little bit more. And although COVID, and I’ve said this so many times that although COVID is terrible, horrible, and what’s happened is catastrophic.
The silver lining is that it’s teaching us a new way to work and new shift in the office culture that we don’t have to be there five days a week, you know, that we could, we can have a work-life balance, but I definitely feel that for myself, being able to balance things more, um, being, uh, able to work from home.
And so, um, so yeah, so I, I appreciate what you said. And, um, and, and I also that thought that you just said, um, You know, I know I can do it because I have been doing it, you know? Um, I think that that’s really important because a lot of people and myself included, we all know that we can do a lot of the work we do as a consultant, um, and bring that same, but it’s, it’s just getting over that fear.
Um, you know, just taking that step and, um, And I appreciate that. You know, you could have, you could have, like you said, like you were, it, it was hard to, to go drive, make that drive home, but you could have easily just said, all right, I’m going to Polish my resume. And Monday comes by and I’m going to start applying for new jobs, you know, but you just took matters into your own hands.
Like, Nope, I got this and I want to go. Um, and it is a grind. You do have to choose it is. And that’s the thing. Once you choose it, like if, and when you choose, you know, what I do on the autonomy, I want to be my own boss, et cetera, et cetera. Um, it’s not, you know, having the clients, I mean, yes, that person.
And that’s another thing I was talking to someone this morning and she was like, you know, everyone says. Just do it and you can do it. If that person does it, blah, blah, blah. And it’s not that easy. So I do want to interject and say, it’s not that easy because that agent, like, if I was working, in-house at a, you know, uh, in a marketing department, um, I can’t tell that product, but I can, I can tell a company how to sell the product.
Right. Um, and if I was working in an agency, I know I can be my own agency. Because I was doing the work, getting the clients through the door, becoming a business person, because essentially like once you become an entrepreneur, yes, you have all the liberties in the world. Now go do it. It’s like become a business person.
So you have to learn. And as you well know your accounting, your networking, your suddenly your HR, your accounting, your marketing, your sales, and you’re the one implementing all. Of the work you’re doing your own social media, your own, you’re doing your address at like everything a hundred percent is on you.
And so, um, while it is hard and it is a grind and it is something you do have to choose every day. Um, I love it because I was listening to a podcast that said, when you’re in this position, you have to look at the values that you have. So if you value a paycheck, Don’t do it because it’s not going to be regular for a while.
You don’t know what the wireless you could have. Like you were saying a big month and you’re like, all right, this is golden. I’m good. The following month, you have people saying, you know what, um, I can’t pay you this month or can I get an extension or whatever? And you’re suddenly facing your lowest grossing month.
So if you value a check. If you value a title, if you value, you know, you want to be the whoever you want to be, the manager you want. It’s when you’re your own boss shirt, you can be the CEO, but at the same time, like that doesn’t come easy. Right. So it depends on your values. And if you value, um, if you’re okay with a low income for a while, because the value is in how you got that, like, For yourself, how you worked for it for me, like if I earn a dollar from a client, that dollar is worth more than a million that I got from a boss, because it was like, I did it, um, with them.
I, it’s not a, you know, it is a, it’s a, it’s a team effort here, but yeah, I just, um, it’s, it’s fun. It’s challenging. And I still. I mean, I don’t know that I could do another interview. And I think that’s when you brought up the interview, I remembered after I got laid off, I was like, I can’t, I can’t the idea of cleaning up my resume right now and talking anyone else into giving me a job.
I just, I can’t even prove it to myself right now. I’m just it’s me, myself. And I gotta, I gotta hit the ground here. Um, So, yeah, it was, you know, nothing, like I said, like nothing has come easy. I don’t think any entrepreneur starts off with it being easy. Um, and so we all come to it in a different way and sticking it out is, is the real challenge, I think.
Um, but it’s fun. I mean, but I have a very twisted. Version of fun, right?
Angeza: Yeah. Well, you know what I, uh, I was just about to ask you too, you know, what your advice would be with someone that just wants to get started and, and definitely in getting clients and figuring out where clients are and how do you sell yourself.
And what I appreciate you sharing is that you are. You are doing the marketing, like the actual work around web marketing and web design and all the work that you do and the services that you offer, you’re tubing that for your clients, but you, you yourself or your own client as well, because you have to do it for yourself too, on top of everything else.
And I, yeah, I can totally say that for me. It’s just. I try to carve out a period at some time during the week. And I literally have to be very conscious about that. And it’s, it’s either, do I edit and get a podcast episode schedule? Do I, um, you know, market my business, do I market this? And it’s, I feel like there’s always these competing demands for my time.
Um, It’s all about putting in systems, right. Putting in like organizing and actually being disciplined. And you and I both, we took the action takers, um, clap, right? Taking it again? Yes. Oh, you are. Are you doing the self study? Uh, yes. Yeah. Um, uh, are you, is it new? Is it a new Stephanie? Is that why? I think, yeah, I think they said there’s going to be some new stuff and, um, to go ahead and try it out again and, um, and give feedback, but I’m happy to go through the material again, to cause as you know, it kind of gives you that boost, right? It’s like a boom. And then you kind of go off and maybe next year I’ll do it again. Or six months or however long it’s been, since we did it, let me know how it was in the online. I want to know. Um, yeah. I want to know what happens if you do it once, so then you do it again.
Cause I raised about that, but yeah, definitely gives you that boost. But one of the things that we talked about in that was your ideal calendar, like your ideal schedule of the week, um, and blocked time blocking, you know, saying like. From this time to this time CEO from this Henderson, I’m an accountant or whatever.
Yeah. Yeah. And being able to do that. And for me, because I still work full time and I’m running this business kind of like evenings and weekends when I can find some time, my biggest struggle. And I’ll ask if you’ve actually had this to it, although you’re doing it full-time but you’re still doing it on your own.
Um, My biggest struggle was seeing people doing so much, you know, accomplishing so much and really putting so much time and effort into things on their businesses. And then I was looking at my business. I was like, well, I don’t even have time to figure that out. I don’t have time to do this. I can only do.
One of four things today. Uh, so what am I going to do? And I really had to, I was trying to do it all for a little while, even though I promised myself I wouldn’t. And then in November, I actually, I feel like I believe in the universe and the universe taking control and its own that, um, hands when you’re not listening or paying attention.
But in October I started feeling the burnout. I started feeling like I was getting more irritable. Like I. I would rather have sat in front of my computer all day, all night, then like gone and spend time with my daughter, which, you know, I started the business so I can get more time with her. Now, the business was taking more time away from her that.
Um, if I didn’t have the business, I would still get that time with her. Um, and so I, I really had to sit and reflect it in October. I was like, okay, in December, I’m going to take a couple of weeks. I’m gonna take the month of December off my podcast. Um, I’m just going to kind of do the CEO staff, do the backend stuff to help me grow the plan for the next year, et cetera.
Well, I was trying to push through, push through, push through in October and around Halloween, my laptop, which is a brand new laptop. I remember you. Yeah. I saw that. Yeah.
It just wouldn’t turn on my nightmare. And luckily I saved because I actually was running out of space on my hard drive though.
It’s quite a bit of space that I was running out of space and things were getting slow. So somebody recommended I get cloud storage. It was like the best decision ever. So I store everything on the one drive with Microsoft and just have it embedded on my computer. So everything’s on there so I can get access.
And it’s just, that really saved my life because I wouldn’t have lost everything. Um, yeah. And so like my laptop died and I’m going, I’m like, they’re like at the repair place. And I’m like, are you guys going to help me? And I go to Apple and Apple’s like, come back next week. We’re super busy. I was like, Oh no, I can’t.
I can’t write. So I went to London drugs and they said, Oh, come like later today, we’ll help you. I was like, perfect. I get there. And their check is like, this might take two weeks. And I was like two weeks. Like how could I be without a locked for two weeks and, and ended up being kind of like what I needed because I, because I literally could not work because I wanted to, and I can only do so much off my phone.
Right. Yeah. And it forced me to take the two weeks off to rejuvenate to really reprioritize my life, to feel what it was like to not have a business in a sense to like have my evenings and weekends back to myself, it was nice. And it really made me think kind of like where my priorities are. And I had a moment where I thought to myself that, um, You know, the people that you see on social media, people that you see running these businesses well, that you see, do they have help on the backend that you don’t know about?
Right? Like you’re helping so many people with their business, but they’re not, they’re not putting your face on their business or you don’t, people don’t know that you’re there. Um, And I was like, people have different priorities. Like not everybody has a kid that they want to spend time with. Not everybody has a partner, um, that they spend time with.
Not everybody has like a large family that takes some time of theirs. Not everybody has the same life. It’s you? And so everyone has different things they’d like to do and you don’t truly ever know what they feel like. So, um, and the reason I’m sharing this is because it takes me back to what you said about you really just have to be okay with it and really have to want to do all that work.
Um, if you want those luxuries. So what if there is somebody that kind of like, isn’t the same boat as you, and especially now with COVID obviously, um, With everything. And there’s tons of layoffs, tons of unemployment going on in businesses, restructuring and moving online and doing that kind of stuff.
What if there was someone that was in your position when and had the same feelings that you had when you were making a drive from Syria to Vancouver, um, after you were laid off, what would you say to them and you know, or what would you say to yourself being, being where you are today?
That somehow some way it will work out.First of all. So it’s not the end of the world, first of all.
let’s see, what would I say if you’re yeah, if you’re like, should I, or shouldn’t I, if it’s in you at least try, um, absolutely. Because we’re still in a pandemic. This is actually an opportune time to start something. Um, because there are more supports and more people will understand.
Not that you need people to understand, but you will have that more than you would before. Where like, when I, it was pre pandemic when I started this. So. So it was like, are you sure? Like, you know, you get friends still sending jobs and it’s like, no, no, I’ve burned the boats. And that’s one thing that I was also talking to, but I say this a lot because Tony Robbins says it.
Um, and it’s true. It actually has kind of gotten me through and ironically, Anna. I’ll explain in a sec, but ironically, like, so when we came to Canada from Egypt, um, a lot of my friends, families would say like, Oh, we’re gonna, you know, they would go to Egypt and they would stay in that apartment that there are families.
Secured and still have there. And I think at one point I said to my parents, like, why didn’t you keep that apartment? Like, we don’t even have, you know, it would be so much cheaper if we could fly there and then have a place to stay and not have to deal with this. And I don’t remember which parents said this, unfortunately, but it was like, if we kept something there that would be a fallback and we wouldn’t be, um, we wouldn’t work as hard to stay in Canada.
If there was a fallback and it’s the same idea as the burning, the boats situation. And it is, there is a historical reference to it. Um, when the Spanish went to Mexico, it was like burn the boats because we’re going to make this work. That’s the gist of it. That’s my layman’s term. But essentially like if you’re going to get into something, pretend if you have a net pretend it’s not there.
And if you don’t have a net, that’s even better because you’re gonna. Work harder to make it work. Um, but yeah, if you’re in that situation, if you’ve been laid off, if you’re right now, like I don’t, I don’t like my job. I want to start my own business. Start there’s nobody stopping you from starting, even if it’s slow to begin and you need to keep your job.
Um, but you know, the best way to make it work fully is to go all in. And they say that on shark tank all the time, right? Like if it’s not 100% and then you’re not giving your all. And so to do people have full-time jobs. Start and make it work. Absolutely. Um, it’s just your determination. Find a problem to solve.
If that’s a product, that’s a service. Um, like for me, I kept thinking like, what problem am I solving? And it’s like, small businesses don’t know where to start with marketing at all. And they don’t understand marketing. They don’t understand how to post. They don’t understand what services are available to them, et cetera, et cetera.
So for me, the problem I’m solving is saving time and making money. Um, that’s, that’s what I would say. If you want to start, I’m not going to say it’s as easy as just go for it. It will work out, but if it’s on, if it’s on your mind, don’t, um, Let me say it this way. I don’t regret that. I didn’t continue it since 2014, but I’m working not to regret it in five years quitting now.
Yeah, I appreciate that. Um, yeah, I appreciate that. And I, and it reminds me a lot of, um, kind of this conversation is, like I said, I had fun having my husband, like he took this job and he. You know what stability, right. Stability. It’s just, I mean, there’s a family too, like kids. Right.
Angeza: And, uh, I mean, we’re, you know, we’re, um, I feel that we’re really blessed in a sense had.
We have a bit of, you know, savings that we can fall back on. And we have some flexibility there. We have so much family nearby that like, you know, things really hit the fan and we need to kind of move out or whatever. We have so many people we can move in with, you know, that would be, could send and, you know, uh, help us.
And that would be so great. The biggest thing to him that I think him and I feel this wholeheartedly is that your mental health. Is the most important thing. In this whole entire world, because your mental health, if it suffers your physical health, suffers your emotional health, suffers your family, suffers your friends, suffer your job, suffers everything around.
You will crumble. If you don’t take care of your mental health. And so I told him, I said, do you need to really sit down and reflect and think about it? Is this job sucking the life out of you, is it causing you? And I could see it in, in his, you know, he’s a very easy going guy, right? He’s very easy going.
It’s very easy to kind of like shrug things off and things don’t get to him very easily, but I could see that he was carrying some extra weight and he kind of had this conflict where like, he’s like, I stay late. Cause I gotta keep my job. And I’m so new. It’s only been three months. But I miss, I miss out time with my daughter and he only was getting 10 minutes every evening.
Like, he’d be homeless six 45 and seven and everything. And I had been kind of telling him, you know, like I said, I’ll support you, whatever you want to do. But this working late and expected to work weekends and taking time away from your family is absolute. No, like I would rather, you have like zero income, no job, but be home, you know?
And I said, let’s. You don’t figure it out. He was, he’s like was more loyal. He’s like, well, I can’t just leave them. We’re in the project, blah, blah, blah. And I said to him, and I, and I say this to everybody actually listing, is that when you feel like you can’t do something, you need to reflect what that is and where that trauma is coming from.
Because when you say you can’t, you gotta, you gotta self reflect. You gotta figure out what it is. And. For him. It was the fact that, um, you know, his, his, you know, his dad works and his mum stayed home to take care of the kids. It was more of a traditional household and he realized that that was the stability that he always felt needed to happen.
Like he needed to always have a job as his dad always needed to have a job. In order to keep the family to float. Right. And, um, and he knew what he, right. When I brought it up, he was like, I know exactly what it is. And I know why. And it actually was funny because even though our daughter is two on this past Sunday, actually she, how my husband goodnight and said, I’ll miss you daddy.
And just like just the fact that she was very intuitive. And so just the fact that she said, I’ll miss you, daddy. It made me feel into it. We both knew that she knew she wasn’t, you don’t see much of him until next weekend. And I think that really kind of what was the nail in the coffin for him? Because he was like, okay, now she can feel it.
Like now she knows that I’m not around now. She knows that my work is taking away and. And, uh, and yeah, and then he just literally woke me up yesterday. 6:00 AM. He’s like, Hey, he’s like, I’m quitting. I’m like, all right. Oh my gosh, I’ll see you later, you know, notice and everything, but he quit. And, and I got him this book and like, I wish I could remember the author’s name, but.
He’s a life coach and the books had one decision and it’s like, and it’s all about just, I can’t tell you the whole summary seven, read the book, but I’ll just tell you what it was on the covers on the back cover, but he’s literally, it says how making one decision to believe in yourself. And to stop doubting yourself can make the change that you need to have in your life.
Um, and for him, I was like, this is your one decision. That’s going to change your life because you don’t have a fallback. You don’t have a job and you don’t have something else lined up. You literally are quitting with nothing else. And like you said, there’s no fallback, so you’ve got to make this work.
Um, and surprisingly, he’s been telling people, he told people at work today and he was telling me, he said, people were shocked. They were like, you just quit with nothing else to fall back on. Like, you’re not, you don’t have a job. Like you don’t. We were confused. And I, and I appreciate what you said too, because it’s just that, it’s just like, you don’t have a fallback.
You gotta make it work. You gotta put it in a hundred percent and not, and people won’t. I was talking to my client this morning. Like people won’t understand, but they don’t have to, they’re not the ones that are going to incur the repercussions of whatever your decision is. And so that’s actually, I’m going to.
Add something to your question of what would you to say to someone if you’re going to make this decision decide early on, who you’re going to listen to and who you’re not going to listen to? Yeah. That is like, I think probably the first thing you need to, you need to follow, you got to follow your instincts.
If this is something that you’re going to do, um, then yeah. Decide who you’re going to listen to. If they’re not going to be there for you when you fall, then you don’t need to listen to them because the majority of this world, and it’s totally fine. The world runs on nine to five. We need people to work nine to five.
You know what I mean? Like it is a capitalist society. So. There’s nothing wrong with working nine to five, but it’s so ingrained in our system that, and our being that the majority of people will say, what do you mean? Like, what do you mean you’re you don’t have anything to fall back on because they themselves they’re projecting, right?
Like their own fears. And maybe I’ve heard people say too, like, I wish I was that brave. You know, I wish I was that brave to take on my own thing, but I don’t have it in me. And so you gotta know who to listen to and who not to listen to and take everything with a grain of salt Lake. You will go to negativity, family.
That’s like, here’s a job offer. I think that could work for you, you know? Um, and just go, no, but this is, this is not my baby. Like now my child. Um, and I have to care for it. And if I have to stay up till 3:00 AM, sometimes I was here, like working on a Shopify site one night. So three or four in the morning, and it was actually glorious.
I loved it because I knew that I was helping my client get to their goal. Um, it wasn’t to hand in a report in the morning that nobody was ever going to thank me for maybe that’s narcissist. I don’t know, but it there’s just, there’s a, there’s a gratification. And that comes from doing your own thing that I don’t think I could ever get from working for someone and I to your, to your husband.
It’s a decision and to anyone that’s thinking, um, of, of, you know, jumping ship, um, I also have this, I read this quote once that keeps popping in my mind, um, not to give your life to something that would to accompany that would replace you within 24 hours of your own death. Right. Like, and they have to, the show must go on.
Um, and so, yeah, just listen to your instincts. And, um, and, but know who to listen to aside from that herself. Yeah. I think I’ve read that same quote as you heard hurting, because I it’s always been in the back of my mind is that, um, if the CEO takes a lunch break, you take a lunch break. If the CEO leaves early, you leave early.
And it’s just, it’s just to me, it’s just a sense of, you know, you’re not, although the worst thing you may be doing is important. You’re not that important because you’re just an other person that can be replaced with new ideas and new modes. My sister is actually she’s, she’s a year younger than me, but she’s, uh, her perspective of careers and jobs is totally different from mine.
And she loves the stability. She was at her first career job for nine years, nine years, her entire twenties, one job just in the last year, she started thinking to move and she made that switch just recently. I switched my jobs every two years, like two years, as long for me, like 18 months. Like I get, you know, and I always have my eye on what’s next, what’s next.
And, and, uh, and I’ve realized in the last few years it’s because, um, Nothing is as fulfilling or nothing is keeping me as challenged. Um, and I, I feel like I’ve tapped out at, you know, I don’t like cyclical work. Like I, don’t kind of like every year, the same kind of stuff come back and you do the same thing.
I like new projects, new innovations, new businesses, or new things to look at. And, uh, and that’s what I think entrepreneurship is so interesting to me because it’s you meet someone new, you meet a new business, you learn something new. Yeah. No two days are the same.
Mariam: Exactly. Yeah. And like, for me to that point, like working with different types of clients that own very, very different types of businesses, it gives me that challenge a different challenge for every single.
Project where it’s like one day it’s weeks, one day it’s Shopify, one day, it’s just social media where, you know, there’s such a, there’s such a difference and it keeps me. He going and it keeps me interested as well. Cause yeah, you want to only work with people that are interested in your business
Yeah, exactly. Yeah. And then, and then just to talk about your piece about, you got to listen to, you know, you got to keep track of who you want to listen to. I was just listening to a podcast with Renee Brown and Tim Ferriss and doc shepherd and Dax Shepard said, um, on birthday Brown, um, podcasts. And that shepherd said that the best advice he’s ever been given is that, um, You don’t listen to what other people have to say about you.
You don’t listen to what they’re either thinking about you or saying it about you or what they’re doing, because that’s really none of your business. It’s none of your business to know what they’re doing and saying, and you’re only businesses you, so, um, so I’m a firm believer in living. Yeah. You know, through your own intuition, understanding your own intuition and really listening.
Um, and yeah, and having that key core people and mentors and family and friends that, you know, we’ll give it to real and raw and not sugarcoat it just to make you feel better. But we’ll tell you like, no, and just your logo sucks. Like you need to change it, you know? That will really support you and kind of, you know, do that.
And with that note, I do appreciate when you told me about my website icon, cause I had to, uh, for those that are listening, um, when you have a, when you have a website in the tab, there’s a little icon and usually it’s the logo of the business, but mindset word had the WordPress logo and Maryanne emailed me and was like, Hey, just letting you know, change It’s called a favicon right. Right. Yeah.
Mariam: And a lot of squares I’m, I’m meeting new people, the Squarespace sites, because a lot of people are doing Squarespace. It’s literally a square icon. Um, it’s square, square spaces, logo. Um, but yeah, the favicon it’s actually, it’s so minuscule, but you never know. Who’s like, Well, that just looks amateur.
Right. So, and I know you’re an amateur, so I was like, I don’t want her to look at mature. I don’t want, well, then you’re looking amateur, but to be honest, I’m on my website all the time. I have it open, but I literally have never looked at the little icon, but. After I did it, I was thinking how not for my website, because I would look for the w it would look.
So the w but for other things that I’m on, I’m always looking for the logo to know work safe. I’m the type of person that has hundreds of tabs open, right? Yeah. I would look for the icon because you can’t see the word. Right. You can only see the icon. So I would look for the color. I’d be like, well, that’s the one, right?
Mariam: You want to be as recognizable in the tabs as like a G for Google, for your email or, you know, whatever it may be. Yeah. So, yeah, exactly. Yeah.
Angeza: Yeah. And Maram was so nice to just send me an email and be like, Hey, like you need to switch up your favicon. And I, she taught me how to do it. Which was so kind so nice for her and also.
Um, those that don’t know Mariam was my very first sponsor for this podcast. So I had her, um, a sponsor real on the, on a couple of episodes last month. So, um, I appreciate it. And, uh, yeah, and if you want to support her, you can definitely check out Cockney and media solutions.com and I will link all her website, her social media and everything on the show notes for you.
So you can connect with her. Um, but I really appreciate it. The story that you shared and everything is so incredible, the depth of the work that you’ve done, not only personally, but professionally. Um, and I love the documentary and the book that caught me by surprise because most of the time I read the bio of my, of my guests beforehand, but it’s been such a crazy week that I didn’t get a chance to.
And I actually appreciated that. I didn’t surprise honest. Um, I was just like reading. I was like, like you do this and this too. That’s so cool. So I can’t wait to check out the documentary. Um, let me the link, my, my watch it tonight. Um, and for everyone else, I’ll, I’ll put it on the show notes too, for us to check out and add support Merriam in that.
Mariam: Thank you so much for having me. I know this one kind of longer than maybe we thought, but. It’s such a pleasure speaking to you all every time I speak to you, it’s fun and listening to your podcast has been inspiring. All these lovely, lovely people with their own crazy stories that I’m like what?
So, you know, you’re part of, uh, you’re part of that medium that I was speaking to where you’re communicating and allowing others that opportunity to share their stories. So thank you for allowing me to share my crazy stories.
Angeza: Yeah, I appreciate it. And you know what? We all have stories to share and you have to believe that we do have a story to share.
And, um, yeah. And I know, yeah, it’s just so exciting. So I really appreciate, I really appreciate you and your sharing your story. Thank you so much. Um, yeah, and I look forward to listening, continuing to be a subscriber to your podcast. Thank you for the time today.
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Okay. So I hope that this lesson in this episode has taught you so much and that it’s getting you started to working towards that fulfilling career and that fulfilling life in the successful candidate course, I will teach you a little bit more about how to connect with yourself deeper, how should really figure out your why and its importance.
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Angeza
Angeza’s purpose in life is to share and inspire you with the stories of people from all walks of life who have made small daily commitments to themselves, their purpose and their happiness. These stories will be tangible, easy to digest and implement. Allowing you to begin to understand what makes you, your soul and your mind truly in tune and peaceful. What is it that you are here to do in this world?
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